Unreasonable Words: Corporate Gobbledygook

At the risk of shooting fish in a barrel, I provide this company blurb found at the bottom of a job listing:

“… is an Emmy-nominated media company driving the creative revolution in interactive television through solutions that break through the “fourth wall” to engage audiences, extend subscriber loyalty, and deliver census-level measurement and reporting. The company’s EBIF solutions include the Ad Widgets® end-to-end advertising system and TV Widgets® applications both of which drive viewer engagement and convenience. The AdAim™ Audience Measurement Suite offers census-level measurement of television audience activities and innovative metrics and analytics. … is a leading provider of EBIF technology platforms for Cisco, Motorola, and tru2way set-top boxes and the cloud-based AirCommand™ gateway that connects external devices to digital cable set-top boxes. … products and technology are distributed through partnerships with Comcast Media Center, Time Warner Cable, Charter Communications, Bright House Networks, Rovi, Motorola Mobility, DISH Network, and several smaller operators. …

I assume it’s akin to a “dog whistle,” that is, people who need to know what it means can parse it. And, god knows, I have contributed a lot of organizational double speak in “corporate communications” I’ve “written,” but this bit is pretty incomprehensible to a tech civilian (even one who is a digital producer) and the bits I do understand are a little unsettling. I don’t really want my media to reach out of the device, break the fourth wall, and have a beer with me (while quietly passing all my data to Time Warner).

Great fodder for http://www.wordle.net/, though.

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One thought on “Unreasonable Words: Corporate Gobbledygook

  1. Do you want I should explain this to you ?
    EBIF is the cable industry’s micro ap platform.
    Not a job you want I should think.

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